Carry Me
“Carry me when I don’t have the strength. Show your love and fill my heart with grace.” –Jon Baker and Chris Plank in “Carry Me”
As I sat in the chapel recently, I was in the balcony alone with my thoughts. I read a banner that quoted Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to me all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
That sounded wonderful to me as I sat there all weary-souled with finals, stress and sore muscles from too many hours at the restaurant. This semester has taken me down. I remember a few weeks ago, at the end of a long night on my feet, just at the end of myself, asking my fellow servers, “Please carry me to my tables. I can’t go on!”
Have you ever felt just THAT tired or just that weak? Have you ever worked so hard that you forgot to eat? These are the moments when we begin to realize our frailty. We realize how deeply we need to rely on strength and might that is deeper than our own. Far too often we run out and we can’t go on all alone. We fall way too short.
I can remember being shorter than I am now. Looking up to grown-ups, following pairs of pants while walking at Silver Dollar City or Six Flags and getting lost after following the WRONG pair of pants. Reaching up my baby arms to my daddy’s knees and begging him to pick me up after falling down in a cave as a three-year-old, being carried piggy-back by my Papa on vacation and riding on my uncle’s shoulders at my birthday party, all remind me of that state of sweet dependence on those stronger, taller, and smarter than myself.
While in the chapel, I also read1 Peter 5:6-7: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”
I thought of a time this semester, that left me bewildered and quaking, awake in my bed, with tears streaming, and feeling so completely alone. I remember not knowing why, not understanding how, yet just hurting. In the next few days and weeks, I just begged Jesus to take it, to take it all, to carry me, to be my strength, to be my life, and to sustain me.
Have you found yourself that way? No time to shower, forgot to eat, completely left yourself behind, maybe even found yourself in tears at 4 am and feeling all alone? These are the times that we realize how much we need Him. These are the times that He will not turn us away, but He will gently and lovingly invite us into His arms, and hold us, and if we listen carefully, we may even be able to hear Him singing over us, reminding us of His love. I think of God singing over me when I hear Brady White’s song “Brand New Day”: “I’m gonna be here forever/ My love for you won’t slip away/ Some days you’ll fall down, but there’ll always be a brand new day.”
With each new sunrise, and each new lesson learned, I find myself trusting, knowing that He will be there, and that I am never alone because He cares for me. Everything that throws me off and makes me wonder, the Lord knows about it and waits for me to bring it to Him and trade for something so much better: His burden, His love, and His gentle care–like bringing a pile of dusty rocks and broken glass, and going home with a bouquet of flowers and a sweet lullaby.
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