Confessions of a Hard Heart
This week I was sitting with some people telling “inspiring stories” in their Christian lives. Many of the people around in the room were edified as a woman explained her most intimate moment with God, or as a young man told a story of how God provided for him after he prayed. Typically, I rolled my eyes and kept my mouth shut.
Then I realized, theses people do not have a problem, I do. These people’s faith was not naïve, nor were their stories unbiblical. The problem was that I was unwilling to hear them. It was not that their stories were not powerful, but that my heart was (and likely still is) hard. Here was a real moment to find fellowship with other Christians, and I blew it.
This was also extremely hypocritical of me. I’m often critical of Christians who are not willing to understand my struggle with epistemology. Yet I find myself unwilling to extend the same respect and understanding to other Christians. Although I have to dig deep into every issue before I say I understand it, not all Christians are like this. I have a very hard time remembering this.
For example, when dealing with the issue of identity, many Christians say one should “find their identity in Christ.” I personally need to dive deep into the theory of consciousness, ontology, and theology before I can even claim to understand this. However there are many godly Christians who understand this statement and move on. As long as this Christian loves God with his or her heart, mind, and soul, we are in good shape.
The thing is that not everyone goes to seminary, or majors in religion, or philosophy. Not everyone should be expected to. God saves college professors and college janitors. He loves corporate executives and garbage collectors. He seeks after book authors and the illiterate.
It has often been said that the gospel is simple enough a child can understand it. Yet at the same time it is complex and deep enough that the greatest mind can study it all its life and still not fully comprehend it.
I struggle with the same thing. It’s easy to roll my eyes at people who haven’t had the same educational opportunities I’ve had. I have to work on articulating robust, orthodox theology in a loving way, that’s for sure! And if you’re interested in consciousness stuff I found an interesting article on it on a blog today: http://christiancadre.blogspot.com/
Blessings!
awesome post man! i stumbled on this blog searching on “hard-heart” and low and behold i find my struggle told by you. how awesome!
thanks!
Good points Josh M - we all need to be more understanding towards one another - and the true key is loving one another anyways (although theology and stuff is fun - it is also over some people’s heads). I never knock the studious - God willing we should all be as studious!
But I get it - I know what you mean - I have been there a lot of times and it reveals our weaknesses…we are human and we are proud at times. We hear stories which seem less educated and we think ‘ I am smarter than that’…I think everyone has a bit of this in them…including me (for sure and I hate that about myself).
My wife calls me on this and I am thankful she does - I am cocky sometimes thinking I have all the answers when in reality - I have scratched the surface and little more else. Humility is a great thing to have as a present.
“It has often been said that the gospel is simple enough a child can understand it. Yet at the same time it is complex and deep enough that the greatest mind can study it all its life and still not fully comprehend it.”
I’d have to agree with that statement. And it actually reminds me of graduate school, where I met some of the smartest idiots ever.
You find more answers once you stop asking so many damn questions!
If I were in your shoes I would have rolled my eyes too…
It’s very hard to believe some of the stories as it sometimes is just too sensational…
An encounter with God is a very personal event and definitely sensational but it cannot be put into words…. Sometimes it is those who say the least but who have that shimmer (i don’t know how else to describe it) that are more believable and inspirational….